Hungry

This morning as I prepare for worship, I suddenly realized I am hungry for this 90 day immersion in the Word.  And I know the hunger transcends the simple ink on paper we call the bible.  My hunger is the deep desire to know God, to relate to Christ more intimately and intensely.  This very thought brings joy and excitement, even energy to my day. 
One cannot find a better description of the desire I feel for God as Song of Solomon.  In it's entirety it is a poem that shares the anxiety of lovers separated, awaiting the day to be joined together forever.  They have had opportunity to slip away for private moments, but the overwhelming message is one of separation from the one she and he so passionately desires.

Song of Solomon 8:6b-7

 Love is as strong as death,
   its jealousy unyielding as the grave.
It burns like blazing fire,
   like a mighty flame.
Many waters cannot quench love;
   rivers cannot sweep it away.

God, I wait for you. I pant for you as a deer pants for water; as young lovers hearts beat with desire.

Getting Ready!

This morning after a couple of welcomed encouraging emails from you, I entered each days reading assignments into my MS Outlook Calendar. I have 6 "grace days" in case I get behind. The most touted reading plan has Zondervan behind it and they have 2 days grace built into the 90 day reading plan.

I am feeling confident today in Christ and this little Christian community we have around this blog. Phil. 4:13 - I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.

Do I Really?

As I think about the daunting task, the discipline required, to actually read the entire bible in 90 days, I cringe.  It's not that I fear reading the holy book.  I dive into the Word frequently.  It's not that I fear trudging through endless lists, genealogies, tedious law and repetitive prophetic diatribes.  What really causes me great hesitation is that I do not trust myself to make good on the project.   I know how undisciplined I really am.  I look at my gut and know.  I see my choices in how I spend much of my downtime (horizontally) and know I have a steep mountain of insecurity to climb just to overcome the fear of failure.

I have told myself that even if i fail and it takes me longer than the 90 days, what harm is there.  I am reading God's Word, right?  There's great reward even if I straggle behind the marathon runners in completing the race.

Why do I want to do this?  Is this for me? For God? For the church?  Is it for vanity? pride? I tell myself it is because I so love God and His Word.  I desire to deepen my ties and my time with Him.  I love getting into the Word.  I suppose it is because I recognize my hunger and my passions.  Reading the bible is almost always a great experienced for me.  I do best in dialogue with others, but there's plenty of me yapping in my own head that I carry on conversations with my various selves quite easily.

So here I am publicly talking myself into reading the Bible in 90 days.  I want to wait until Ash Wednesday on March 9th of this year and complete it by Pentecost on June 12th.  That's actually 96 days counting 3/9/11 and 6/12/11 and every day in between.  So I build in a little wiggle room which fits my style. 

See I am already planning for failure!   Ugh!

Friends and family, I am asking you to help me stay accountable.  I believe if you will join me in this journey, I will have enough performance anxiety to push me.  Here's what I am asking you to do.

1) pray for me to achieve this goal to read the entire bible in 90 days
2) read my posts at your leisure
3) ask me how I am doing and nudge me when you sense I am drifting from the goal.

You can also post comments to my posts if you wish, but that is not a requirement, only if it seems like something you want to do.

OK, so I now have 28 days, counting today, to procrastinate! to talk myself up into or out of this. 

God, help me, I am a lunatic!  Perhaps, You will grace me with the ability to develop discipline. 
In Jesus Christ's name, I pray. Amen